Sirius the Godfather and the Troubling Times of Parenthood
by BetweenLines55
Summary: A collection of AU story snippets about Sirius the Godfather and his sidekick Remus the Werewolf, as they embark on their journey to raise the angsty, trouble ridden, hero of the Wizarding World. T cause Wolfstar and swearing.
1. Things He's Pants At

**This story is going to be a fun one. Hell, I've had fun writing it so far. It's a series of one shots, basically, which are going to be more or less unrelated. Jo Rowling's stuff doesn't belong to me, and don't forget, reviews feed my lonely inbox.**

**Things He's Pants At: Discipline **

A little drapery couldn't kill Sirius Black. A cracked cousin hell bent on starting World War Three couldn't kill Sirius Black. A full grown werewolf with no Wolfsbane that only had primal instincts to rip, tear, and kill couldn't kill Sirius Black.

A teenager named Harry James Potter just might.

Sirius was happy, really, that he finally had it all: his name cleared, his motorbike back, a fresh pack of cigarettes, his Moony, and now Harry. It was wonderful to curl up in the evenings, tucked under Remus's arm and to listen to a show on the wireless with his godson. That was his favorite type of day.

It was _not_ wonderful, however, when Sirius and Harry couldn't agree on a damn thing. Poor Remus would usually get caught in the middle of one of their ecstatic fights, and would have to try and calm everyone down with a cup of tea and a bit of chocolate. Sirius always felt bad for him, the man had enough gray hair what with being a werewolf and part of the Order of the Phoenix in the middle of a bloody _war_, but it couldn't be helped really. Harry was just like James, and when Sirius and James hadn't been getting along, they couldn't agree on a damn thing either.

Honestly and truly, Sirius felt himself rather good with children, but he soon realized that was only with _other people's_ children when he got one of his own, sort of. He was good at being "fun, uncle Sirius" and then handing the child over at the end of the day to their parents to be disciplined and put to bed.

Sirius was not good at discipline, but Harry was not the easiest child _to_ _discipline_, so it really couldn't be helped. That's what Sirius told himself to make it better, at least.

Remus was much better at that sort of thing. (But then, Remus was a hell of a lot better at a lot of things Sirius wasn't up to par with. That's why they made such a good pair.)

Take, for example, one summer evening of 1996, before Harry's sixth year, the first year the three were together as a family. No Weasleys, no Dursleys; just a Lupin, a Potter, and a Black sitting at dinner.

Dinner was lovely. Remus and Sirius had whipped something up, while Kreacher poured drinks and Harry set the table. Sirius had thrown all the windows wide open, letting out the stuffy, hot air, and letting in the slightly less stuffy but certainly just as hot London breeze. It was the kind of warmth that made Sirius long for some Muggle air conditioning.

Muggles may be strange, but they did get a lot right.

The three had sat down at dinner once Kreacher had taken a plate for himself and bid them a curt adieu. After testing for poison in the drinks, and coming up negative, the three had dug into their food.

It was Remus, who had made the mistake of mentioning it, "Siri, Dumbledore wants us at Hogwarts tomorrow at five or so for the next briefing."

Harry's ears perked up considerably at that. "I get to go, right?"

Sirius shared a look with Remus and sighed. Harry was the Chosen One, yes, but he was still underage. This was the part of parenting that Sirius was sure he'd never get right.

"Ah," Sirius said, "I don't think you'll be able to go, Prongslet. It's really for Order members only, I want you to be involved, but unfortunately not everyone in the Order thinks that way."

Harry, who had been in the middle of having a drink, slammed his cup down, lemonade sloshing over the sides. "Harry, please-" Remus, ever the peacemaker, started.

"I thought you were going to fight _for_ me, Sirius! Not agree with them! You said I had as much reason to be there as any other witch or wizard, and now you're going back on what you said?!" Harry shouted.

"Look, Prongslet, just for now-"

"No, not just for now, it's not all right. It's not the Order that's going to have to kill Voldemort, it's me, and I thought you two understood that, but obviously not."

"Now look here, Harry," Remus said, and Sirius could already see the hackles of the Wolf raised. As calm and understanding as Remus was, Moony was still a wild animal. Lots of people forgot what a full grown male werewolf was capable off, "Sirius and I are doing our best to try and get you into some of these meetings, but you're still not an Order member. These meetings can bring horrible news-"

"You don't think I know that!?" Harry said, jumping to his feet with a screech of the wood chair in the stone floor. "I've been locked up in a cupboard and denied food, I've been hexed and cursed, bitten by a Basilisk, made to cut up my own skin, tortured by Voldemort; I know how bad things are! I'm not a child!"

Harry turned, and Sirius could hear Harry stomp up the steps, and the bang of Harry's bedroom door slamming.

Sirius banged his head against the table, releasing a large sigh. A warm, calloused hand settled on his shoulder, "It's not your fault, Pads, James was exactly that way when he was that age, you know that."

"He's right though," Sirius said, raising his head and placing his own hand on top of the one on his shoulder, "I promised I would fight for his right to be at those meetings."

Warm gold eyes crinkled at the edges as Remus smiled, "You'll get him there, love, but not this one." Sirius returned his smile, "The thing is Rem, now that he's ours, I don't want to ever let him go. But I suppose I'll go talk to him," Sirius said, scooting his own chair back with a screech, "you stay and eat, one of us should."

Remus chuckled, and Sirius made his way to Harry's room.

.

.

.

The house had taken a hell of a drastic design turn once Harry had moved in, but none so much as the room Harry now resided in, Sirius's old one.

Sirius had been sad to see the raunchy posters and moth eaten Gryffindor decorations go to some extent, but he was happy to move them along and look upon them fondly with old childhood memories. Memories of when life wasn't quite as screwy and he took a sick sort of comfort in his parents' predictability, even as horrible and biased as it was.

Reggie's room was still untouched. It was something the four residents of Number 12 Grimmlaud Place did not talk about, as some sort of unwritten pact.

Steeling himself, Sirius knocked on Harry's door. The former convict who had spent a dozen years in _Azkaban_ would not lose to a-practically-sixteen-year-old. He was not surprised though, to find the door locked and an indignant cry of, "Just go away."

"You do realize a locked door isn't going to keep me out, pup." Sirius said, pulling out his wand, "_Alohorma_." The lock snapped open, and Sirius let himself in.

Harry was sitting on the far edge of the bed, facing away Sirius, towards the window. The view had been better when Sirius used to look out the window from the same spot his godson was; it was now obstructed by some new high rise and you couldn't see to East Sussex anymore.

The walls of Harry's room weren't covered in raunchy posters and Gryffindor memorabilia, but of all sorts of pictures: old baby pictures before the scar, of James and Lily, of all the Marauders in their sixth year or so (Peter excluded of course, his part of the picture torn off), the Golden Trio, Harry and all the Weasleys, and most recently and definitely Sirius's favorite, a picture of himself, Harry and Remus hugging and laughing, all together at Grimmlaud. Sirius climbed over the bed and sat down next to Harry, who was holding a photo of James and Lily, holding an exuberant little Harry.

"I'm not really mad at you," Harry said quietly, his voice thick. Sirius gave an overdramatic side of relief, "Thank Merlin for that, I don't know how I would have handled it."

Harry gave a half smile, and finally looked up at Sirius. The Chosen One's eyes were a bit watery and red, and that was all Sirius needed to know before he scooped his godson up into his arms. "How am I going to stop Voldemort, Sirius, if I don't know what the hell is going on? I've been grasping at straws the entire time and barely scraping by. I need help and no one's giving it to me."

"Are you scared, pup?"

Sirius felt strong hands grip his shirt, as Harry nuzzled his face into his shoulder. It was uncharacteristic of Harry to do this, who usually shied away from unneeded touching. The answer came out in barely more than a whisper, "Yes."

Reclining on Harry's bed, and holding his godson close to him, relishing in the fact Harry was letting himself be held, Sirius said, "I-ah, look, Harry, I'm pants at this sort of thing, so bare with me, all right? The Order doesn't want to scare you with some of the reports that are coming in. There's information that were getting that makes me want to curl up and never leave Grimmlaud, which, let's face it, I can't stand. You need to stay informed, but we don't want to _terrify_ you."

"Too late," Harry said, muffled by Sirius's shirt. Sirius gave a bit of a humorless chuckle, "Yes, I suppose so, but do you really need to know the condition 23 Muggle children were found dead in, with a Dark Mark branded in the air above them?"

Harry looked up suddenly and met his godfather's gaze, "I-I suppose not."

"He's done horrible things, and you have enough nightmares as it is. I'm your legal guardian now, and I have always been your godfather, it's my job to protect you as much as I can, even if it's minuscule." Sirius said. Harry settled back down, resting his his head on Sirius's chest, "But I can't be left in the dark, Padfoot."

"Certainly not, I agree with you there. Let's compromise, all right? I'll take some notes for you at the meeting and let you look over them, can you agree to that?"

Sirius carded a hand throw the signature Potter hair as his godson thought, "Okay, if you promise to answer any questions I have."

"To the best of my ability," Sirius promised, and put three fingers in the air, "Gryffindor honor."

Harry chuckled. "So, Prongslet," Sirius said, "are you going to turn in for the night, or are you going to go back down and eat? Either way, I don't care."

"I guess I'll go back down, otherwise, Mrs. Weasley will accuse you of starving me." Harry got up and swung his legs over the bed, placing the photo still in his hand on the bedside table. "And we can't have that," Sirius agreed with a look on his face that he knew was very honest, "That woman is in my tail enough as it is, now help your old godfather up."

Harry helped pull Sirius to his feet, "You're not _that_ old, Padfoot."

With his trademark barking laugh, Sirius grinned and said, "This is why, Prongslet, we get along so well, most of the time. Let's go join Moons now, yeah?"

He'd be the first to say it, Sirius Black was absolute shit at disciplining anyone's children, but he certainly was brilliant at taking care of Harry, who would never go without a meal or kiss to the forehead as long as Sirius (or Remus) lived.

And if the boy didn't kill him, that was going to be a long time indeed.


	2. Things He Does Too Well

**What? Ficlet two already? Yeah, already. I finished it this morning and I really wanted to post it. Thanks for all the reviews, follows and favorites already! Quick side note: Mr. Black drops the f-bomb in this chapter, so if strong language like that bothers you, sorry. But actually not.**

**Things He Does Too Well: Cuddling**

Sirius Orion Black, the Lord of the Most Ancient and Noble House of Black (which, yes, he knows, is a sentence with far too many uppercase letters) is a bit of a cuddler.

He always has been, even since his days at Hogwarts. Even when he and Remus weren't dating, and/or their relationship was perfectly platonic, it wasn't unusual to for the werewolf to wake up on a cold Scottish morning with a long, lean Sirius Black, or a smaller, _furrier_, definitely more snuffly, Padfoot curled up next to him under the duvet.

It's not something Sirius is ashamed of, though at times he knows he can come off a bit too strong. Remus, and all his psychiatric jargon, is sure the pureblood's need for physical contact comes from the lack of it when he was younger. Sirius realized of course, that this is just a fancy way of saying he didn't get enough hugs as a child or something.

He's sure Remus is right though, because he always is, and Remus has no problem with his partner's need to cuddle, because he never does.

They two canines lived in perfect harmony, with Sirius tucking himself into his werewolf's side at night or when they're simply laying on the couch, or coming up behind to hug him, or leaning over to kiss Remus's forehead simply because he felt like it.

Then Harry came along.

Prongslet did _not_ like to be touched more than necessary. Sirius had learned the hard way, sneaking behind Harry to give him a hug, and nearly getting a butter knife between the eyes, or the time before that when he'd reached over the kitchen table to squeeze Harry's hand and got kicked in the shin. Harry apoligized both times with a weak smile, saying he was simply startled, but Sirius called major bs.

It wasn't just Sirius either, that his pup did this to. Harry stiffened when Remus laid a comforting hand on his shoulder, or pulled the teen into his side for a hug. Harry looked like he might pass out every time Molly Weasley locked him into a bone crushing hug and turned positively pale when any of the Weasley children would slap him on the back.

It was more than enough to make Sirius Black, the ever vigilant godfather, a bit worried.

The confrontation came one night as a heavy London storm sat low over the city, making it necessary for Remus to light a fire in the hearth of the parlor to keep out the damp, despite the oppressing heat. Sirius had reclined back into the couch with a crossword, his feet propped up on Remus's lap. The werewolf was reading some way-too-thick-to-bother-with-except-if-you're-Moon y-book in just his shirtsleeves (which Sirius was _greatly_ appreciating) and Prongslet was sitting on the floor actually doing some summer homework for once, which the ex-convict greatly suspected Remus having something to do with.

The lighting was low in the room, coming from some magically lit lamps and the too-hot fire in the hearth. Moons had brought one of the oil lamps over to read by and Harry had one as well, his eyesight being a definite Potter on the eyesight scale of werewolf to flobberworm.

Sirius leaned down, reaching out a hand to ruffle the signature Potter hair on his godson's head. Then everything happened all at once.

Harry swore, his left leg jerking out and knocking over not only an ink bottle but also the oil lamp, a small flame starting on the carpet, which Remus quickly jumped up to put out with a swish of his wand and an, "_Agumenti_." Sirius copied Harry, swearing on Merlin's baggy unmentionables, as he and his godson got everything off the floor.

"Shit, sorry," Harry muttered, looking down at the now ruined carpet, "You startled me."

Sharing a look with Remus, Sirius said, "Harry, that couldn't have been me just scaring you."

Harry continued not to look at them.

"Cub, please, look at us." Remus said, walking over to Harry and laying his hands on Harry's shoulders. The latter flinched.

"Pup, you can tell us." Sirius said, not moving to land a hand on his godson.

The teenager looked up at his guardians, surprising both of them with red eyes and a shaking lip. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."

Remus guided him to the couch, sitting on one side of the boy with Sirius on the other. "What's wrong, cub? Siri's right, you can tell us." Harry curled up onto himself, taking up as little space as possible between his guardians.

"I-I just don't like being touched, ok? I just get all scared and nervous, and it's not like I'm afraid of you two or something, it's just this reaction I have ever since I can remember with the Dursleys and-"

"Harry," Sirius said, stopping his godson's rambling, "did the Dursleys ever...beat you?"

The teenager froze, curling up tighter if possible. That was all the reaction Sirius needed to cautiously, and very slowly wrap his arms around Harry, tucking his shaking godson into his chest. Remus scooted closer, wrapping one arm around Sirius, his other around Harry. The two older wizards could hear Harry sniffling softly, a hiccupy-sob escaping from Harry every now and then.

"I'm sorry about the rug." Harry said, quietly, muffled by Sirius's shirt. Sirius rolled his eyes and then looked to Remus again, "I don't give two bloody fucks about the rug, pup, we'll go buy a new one. I'm worried about you right now. I want you to know Remus and I would never lay a hand on you like the Dursleys did, and if we ever did, you're allowed to hit right back."

Remus squeezed Harry's hand, saying, "We love you so much, cub, and we want you to feel safe. You're ours now, no one is going to hurt you."

"You know either of us would go and kill Voldemort right now if we could, just for you." Sirius said, and a watery chuckle escaped Harry.

"I-ah, thanks. I'm just not used to so much...physical contact." Harry said, still very quiet.

Remus chuckled low in his chest, "That's brilliant, because Sirius is a firm believer in it. No wonder you got kicked in the bloody shin, Pads." He kept laughing to himself, and Sirius scowled. "What Moons here is trying to say Harry is that I'm sure you'll get used to it, with me around. We'll start off small, ok?"

With an expression on his face of absolute contentment, Harry said, "Well, I don't mind this so much, this is...nice." Remus eventually sobered up, leaning his head on the back of the couch. Sirius wordlessly summoned a blanket and threw it over the three of them, tucking it around Harry and Remus.

Sirius was the last one awake, looking at dwindling fire in the hearth. He'd done a good thing today. This was the kind of thing he wanted to do more of. He'd been out of his godson's life for a dozen years, it was high time to turn the tide and get back in the game.

With one last chuckle at a snuffly snore Remus managed to produce, Sirius fell asleep; his head resting on Harry's mop of Potter hair, hand tightly holding Remus's.

Kreacher found them in the morning, and berated them for not putting the fire in the hearth out.

**Thanks for reading guys, see you soon!**


	3. Things He's Got a Lot of

**Ficlet three is here, yay! This has some of Remus's POV, as well as a good deal of Wolfstar. Its not graphic or anything, but if that bothers you, don't read. Wolfstar will only get stronger if the people (you) want it.**

**Things He's Got a Lot of: Memories**

The weather was perhaps just on the brink of becoming unpleasant for this sort of thing. Sirius didn't mind though, because with a blanket, a cigarette, a cup of hot coffee, and a Moony to keep him warm, the cold didn't penetrate his skin. The stars bright enough to get past the glaring London lights twinkled in the cool-ish late-August night, and a half moon lit up the rest of the sky.

Grimmlaud was a rather good place to look at the moon, and that might have been just a tad bit ironic now, but nonetheless beautiful. Sirius wished his small family could stay like this forever, but in a week Harry would be shipped off to sixth year, and not long after that the full moon would glare down at them. Sighing at the idea of a Harry-less house, Sirius bent his head down enough to kiss the unruly Potter hair, then tuck his head back into Remus's neck.

"Hmm, did you two do this often at Hogwarts?"

Sirius jumped, because he could've sworn Harry was asleep two minutes ago. "What d'you mean, cub?" Asked Remus, who was every bit as sleepy as Harry.

"I dunno, stargaze." Was Harry's answer. Sirius stretched, now that all his pillows were shifting and moving, damn them, "Sure, the views helluva lot better in Scotland of course, but yeah."

"I remember Prongs always making some horrendously cheesy quip about Lily's eyes sparkling like Orion's Belt, and Siri would always tell him that his father's belt did not sparkle and there would be a lot of Black family puns that got very tiring very quickly." Remus said. He had a thoughtful look on his face, the one Sirius recognized as the one he often pulled when reminiscing about school days.

"Not my fault all of us are named after bloody stars," said Sirius, nuzzling closer to Remus now that he'd finally stopped squirming. Harry just chuckled and rested his head back on Remus's shoulder, his eyes slipping shut. "I like it when you tell me about my parents, I really appreciate it."

An idea formed in Sirius's head, and stayed there all night, even as Remus and he dragged Harry to his room around two, and then threw themselves into bed with little gusto.

.

.

.

When Remus woke up to an empty bed and cold sheets, he knew something was up. Sirius was not one to get up early, and stayed in bed as long as Remus let him do so. The idea of scouring the house for a note or Sirius himself was unappealing. Sirius knew all about the nooks and crannies this house possessed, it could take Remus an hour to find him.

His question on his partner's location was answered, however, just as Remus was stepping out of the shower and throwing on some clean khakis. A loud thump came from the floor above, the attic, and the unmistakable sound of Sirius swearing from high heaven and back down to hell.

The werewolf dragged himself up the rickety ladder that had been hung with aching knees and into the dusty attic. The attic at Grimmlaud smelled like rotten potions, and centuries of dust getting baked through the one dirty window at the north end of the house.

He smelled Sirius before he saw him, as always, with his hypersensitive werewolf nose, which was as much as a blessing as it was a curse. Sirius always smelled of the French aftershave he was so fond of, and expensive hair products that he liked to buy in Italy. The ex-convict was digging through some dusty boxes, labeled "Sirius's things" in curly script. Harry was also up surprisingly, propped up on a faded chaise that had been dragged to the attic a long time ago, and was an unfortunate pink color.

"Hi Remus," Harry said, noticing him first. Remus waved a sleepy hello and wrapped his arms around Sirius's waist. The other man laughed and straightened, the long hair not tied back in a short ponytail was hanging in front of his face, slightly gray from the dust of the place.

"Morning, luv." Came Sirius voice, "I would've woken you up, but I know your knees have been bothering you."

"'M fine," was the muffled reply, as Remus's face was buried in the side of Sirius's neck, "What are you doing up here, anyways?"

"He's digging out photo albums, to show me." Harry answered. Sirius nodded, turning around in Remus's hold to press a chaste kiss, or as chaste as Sirius got, to Remus's lips, before settling down on the chaise next to Harry. Remus followed.

"I'm surprised a lot of your stuff is still up here, Pads. I thought your parents would have burned it." Remus said, now curled up next to his partner.

Sirius shrugged, brushing some dust off the cover of a photo album he'd found. "My parents bothered with the attic as much as I do. They probably forgot." He opened the album, the spine cracking with age, and the three occupants of Number 12 Grimmlaud Place, were greeted with the sight of a Wizarding photo of twelve-year-old Sirius and James, standing in swim shorts in front of the pond on the grounds of Potter Manor.

Remus was delighted by the sudden grin that had broken out on Harry's face. Sirius must've saw the look too, because he instantly plunged into the story of that summer, staying with the Potters, and eating what must've been kilos of meatloaf and lasagna all baked by Dorea Potter.

Mr. Potter was also mentioned, and stories of all the Marauders were told as they continued through the album. Harry was clutching a picture of his parents like a life line, and it surprised Remus when his own eyes started to tear up.

.

.

.

They were disrupted by Sirius's stomach protesting loudly at the fact he hasn't eaten. He actually jumped when it started to make dying whale noises. Sirius checked his watch, it was almost noon.

"Bloody hell," Prongslet said, who'd obviously spending a bit too much time with Ron, "It's almost lunch time."

Remus stretched beside Sirius, and the ex-convict could hear the werewolf's back cracking. "How 'bout you get lunch started with Kreacher, and Rem and I'll clean up, yeah?"

Harry bounded off the chaise with the youthful vigor Sirius wished he and Rem still had. It was good to look through photos, but it didn't make a little seed of hurt and despair grow in the pit of his chest. Remus scrubbed his eyes as Harry climbed down the ladder.

Rem's eyes were _just_ rimmed with red, and Sirius knew Rem'd been close to tears. Hell, he'd been close to tears himself. "That was good, I'd say we should do it more often if it wasn't so bloody hard to get up here," Rem said.

Nodding in agreement, Sirius pulled himself up from the chaise and packed up the box of albums and momentos again, "Suppose I'll just levitate some boxes downstairs then, after breakfast-er-lunch...um-"

"Brunch?" Remus offered. Sirius nodded, "Yeah, that."

He helped Remus up with a creak and a groan. "It bloody hurts, being old," Remus said. Sirius took the oppurtunity of a standing Remus to wrap his arms around his partner's waist. "Ah, _mais mon cheri_," Sirius said, "_c'est la vie_."

"Mmm," was all Rem said, and placed his head on top of Sirius's. Sirius could remember a time in his life when he actually had a few inches on the werewolf, but now they were long gone, but it wasn't like he was complaining. He closed his eyes, and let Rem's unnaturally warm embrace hold him. Harry needed those memories of their's, even if it killed them.

"This is great for Harry, but I'm an emotional wreck. I don't know if I can keep doing this." Sirius finally said.

He could hear Remus's laugh bubble up from his chest, "Certainly not on an empty stomach." Sirius laughed more out of surprised than anything when Remus and his raw Moony-strength threw Sirius over his shoulder. "Frisky today, aren't you?" Sirius asked. He knew he had a shit-eating grin on his face. It wasn't often Remus was feeling well enough to do much more than cuddle.

"A bit," Remus admitted. "Moony is, anyways, but I think _I_ might have pulled something."

Sirius was still laughing, even as they Apparated down two floors.

**Yay, a third installment. This might be it for a while. School's started, and that's always fun. Not. Lotsa Wolfstar in this chapter. My totes OTP.**


	4. Things He Does Often Part 1

**Hey guys! Hope this is something you can look forward too with school starting and if you don't have school or it hasn't started yet, humor us poor saps who aren't so lucky. This is part 1 of this series of two or three, I don't know yet. All 1st person, in Sirius's POV. WOLFSTAR. Enjoy!**

**Things He Does Often: Suburban Living **

(8:30)

Ugh, Rems got the bloody alarm clock set for this ungodly hour of the morning. He says it's a normal time to wake up, but on a Saturday? Damn him. And now what is he doing, pushing me off of him, he's serious about this whole getting up business? Arsehole.

(8:32)

And he won't let me join him in the shower. The least he could do would be to indulge me this morning. Merlin.

(8:40)

At least he didn't use all the hot water.

(8:49)

Where are my bloody-oh, Moons put my denims on the bed. Nice of him. Ugh, should I shave? No, I look ruggedly handsome, as always, it's fine.

(8:52)

Haha, Moons dragged Harry out of bed, too. I sympathize with you, pup. He looks like he's about to face plant right into his eggs Benedict, though. Maybe I should get him some coffee? Do Prongslets drink coffee?

(8:53)

I really like eggs Benedict.

(8:55)

Mmm, Kreacher made coffee. Harry doesn't want any though, Remus offered him tea.

(9:00)

Harry's looking more awake, good for him, now that he's eaten. Ugh, still to early too be awake. Remus says we're going to someplace called IKEA. What the bloody hell is that?

(9:01)

A: Swedish furniture store.

(9:02)

Ooooh, Remus says there'll be meatballs. This sounds like a great plan.

(9:04)

We get to take the car that we bought, the one I named Elvendork*. It's great cause it's unisex! Remus isn't letting me drive though, he never let's me have any fun.

(9:10)

Prongslet has to sit in the back. What are kids saying nowadays? Oh right, "_lol_".

(9:20)

London has weird smells. Padfoot's intrigued.

(9:22)

Ugh. Remus says that if I want to be Padfoot I have to sit in the back with Harry. He never let's me have any fun. And Harry's laughing at me! Traitor! I thought you were on my side!

(9:25)

_"LUCY IN THE SKY WITH DIAMONDS!_

_LUCY IN THE SKY-*"_

(9:27)

Remus is an agressive driver. He just flipped off the bloke who cut him off. I fear for my life.

(9:34)

Moons wants to get curtains too. Why do we need curtains?

(9:36)

A: because the last time Rem had his monthlies, he tore the ones in the bedroom to shreds.

(9:38)

Why haven't I noticed he lack of curtains?

(9:39)

A: because, and I quote Remus, "The only thing you care about in the bedroom is getting me out of my trousers. I've never met a hornier man than you, Pads."

(9:40)

Harry told us to stop being weird, _lol_.

(9:45)

IKEA's bloody big. And it smells weird. Like meatballs. ...Does Sweden smell like this too, or is it just their furniture stores?

(9:47)

This is insane, why do furniture stores need to be big enough for an elevator? How many curtains and rugs must one store need?

(9:52)

Rem is telling me to behave myself.

Me: "I'm being good! I haven't started to try and get you out of your trousers now, have I?"

Rem: "Please, Siri, we're in a Sweedish furniture store for Merlin's sake."

Prongslet: "You just scarred me for life, Pads."

Me: "Um, no Prongslet, I think Voldemort beat me to that."

(9:53)

Prongslet just hit me! Prongslets are mean to Padfoots!

(9:58)

I think we're lost.

(10:00)

We're definitely lost. There are no curtains or rugs in this section. Only beds.

(10:03)

Oh! Apparently Moons wants to look at beds, too! Oh, right, the frame cracked during our nightly activities last week. It's good someone remembers these things.

(10:04)

We're not lost then, nevermind.

Prongslet: "Stop being weird, you two. Get a room."

Me: "We have one, pup."

Rem: "The bed's cracked, though. We need a new one."

Prongslet's face is priceless. _Lol_.

(10:10)

Rem: "What do you think of the _Brusali*_?"

Me: "What the bloody hell is a brusali? Is it in any relation to broccoli, because I hate broccoli."

Rem: "It's the name of the bed, look! It has storage!"

Me: "Sweden is so weird."

Rem: "Do you like it or not?"

Me: "It's a bed. As long as it holds up, I don't have a problem."

Rem: "Ugh. You're so difficult." *walks away to go find sales person*

Me: "Harry, when's the next full moon?"

Prongslet: "Next Thursday."

That explains a lot.

(10:16)

Rem found a sales girl. She's very pretty. Big tits. Rem told me and Prongslet (bad Prongslet, you shouldn't know about things like that yet!) not to stare. It's hard.

(10:17)

Haha, innuendo. _Lol_.

(10:25)

Remus did most of the talking with the sales girl. I stood there and looked pretty. Prongslet stood there and stared.

(10:27)

Our bed will be at check out. Brilliant.

(10:30)

ELEVATOR MUSIC IS IN MY HEAD. IN MY HEAD.

(10:33)

Time for curtains now. They all look the same. They all smell weird.

(10:34)

I told Rem this.

Rem: "They smell like furniture store, Pads. We can spray them with cologne later if you want."

I want.

(10:38)

Ugh, woman, control your screaming child, some of us have hypersensitive hearing.*

(10:42)

She is literally ignoring her child, while he's got snot running down his face. Rem won't let me say anything. Ugh. If my ears are hurting, Rem's must be exploding. He's such a good person.

(10:45)

Rem: "Taupe or beige?"

Prongslet: "There's a difference?"

Rem: "There's a difference. You can see it, right Siri?"

Me: "They look the same, Rem. Buy whichever one makes you happy."

Rem: *glares*

Me: "Merlin, buy both then."

Prongslet: "It's not like Pads can't afford it."

Me: "Yeah, and then we have extras in case the other set gets shredded."

(10:47)

He rolled his eyes, but he put both in the cart.

Ha.

(10:52)

Me: "We should get more than one rug."

Remus: "And that's because...?"

Me: "Sometimes Padfoot likes to chew on them when his jaw is sore."

Prongslet: "I wonder why your jaw is sore..."

Me: "Prongslets aren't supposed to know about those things!"

Prongslet: "Oh please, Remus called you the horniest man alive, and you wonder why I know about those sorts of things."

(11:00)

Awkward silence has been awkward for too long. A whole eight minutes. I haven't been silent for eight minutes since...I learned to talk!

(11:02)

Me: "You said there'd be meatballs."

Remus: "Once we find some rugs you like, we'll go get some."

Me: "Oh."

Prongslet's Stomach: *gurgle rumble thing*

(11:07)

All the rugs are bloody huge, we don't need bloody huge rugs.

Remus: "What do you think of the blue one?"

Me: "It's not red."

Remus: "Or the purple one, it's got a nice pattern."

Me: "Red, Moons."

Remus: "Or the-"

Prongslet: "The man wants red, Remmy, who are you to take that away from him?"

(11:10)

RED RUGS HAVE BEEN FOUND.

(11:11)

GRYFFINDOR PRIDE.

(11:14)

Beds and curtains and rugs have been found! THANK MERLIN.

(11:15)

MEATBALLS.

**End of part 1! Some notes: **

***Elvendork comes from the prologue JKR wrote for charity.**

***Siri is definitely a Beatles fan.**

***this is an actual model of bed that IKEA makes, look it up.**

***Siri is just a pig puppy, and dogs have better hearing that humans.**

**This plays into my head cannon and a post that I found on Tumblr about Sirius and Remus being the perfect gay uncles for Harry. YES. It's just...yes. I think that Sirius is just one big kid, and that's what Remus loves about him, and Remus is totally a walking sex magnet, because, honestly, he's a Marauder. He can make innuendos, too.**

**Part 2 soon!**


	5. Author's Note: PLEASE READ IMPORTANT

**Hey faithful story readers! I know, I know, this isn't an update, but I promise it's worth your while to read. I know I've gotten a lot of great feed back regarding this story, but I want to know: do you guys want more Wolfstar or more Sirius-Harry-Remus-family-stuff. I have a poll up on my page (if you are on a mobile device and can't access the poll, or don't know how to, read the note at the end) for voting for your pick. In the meantime, there will (hopefully) be a few more one shots in the future. Thank you for your time, and I promise the next thing I post here will actually be an update!**

**IF YOU ARE ON A MOBILE DEVICE:**

**You need to go to be profile like you'd normally do to access a poll, and then scroll all the way to the bottom of the page and click on the blue text "regular site." This should refresh your page into looking something like the normal and the poll should appear at the top of my profile.**


	6. Things He Has to Decide On

**See, I promised another chapter, and here it is. Thank you for the reviews and the feedback I've already gotten. Today's ficlet is brought to you by a tumblr prompt ("Did you break that glass on purpose?"/"It offended me.") and that I'm home sick and have nothing else better to do. Have some Harry POV.**

**Things He Has to Decide On: Family**

Godfathers were a species that still greatly confused Harry (along with kneazels, acromantulas, Hufflepuffs, and women.) They slept in late, but liked to watch the sunrise. They hated reading books, yet could recite Shakespeare by heart. Most importantly they, they hated the Ministry, and continued to work there as Head Auror. Maybe all godfathers were like this, maybe they weren't, but Sirius Black certainly was.

Harry liked to drop by one of his childhood homes and visit his godfather and Remus when rooming with Ron became too much. (Honestly, it was hard to invite Ginny over for the night when her brother was right down the hall.) Sometimes, Remus would be there (mostly on the summer weekdays when when Sirius had to wage war-ahem- work at the Ministry). Then again, sometimes Sirius would be there to chat and offer cigarettes (weekends, year round, and the occasional holiday) which Harry always politely declined.

Sometimes it was both of them, which resulted in a story, a roast, wine, and perhaps a slice of cake.

The savior of the Wizarding World was thinking about just how great a glass of wine was sounding as he let himself into Grimmlaud Place and out of the cold London December. Twinkling lights had erupted in shop fronts practically overnight which made him remember, Remus would be coming back from professoring in a couple of short weeks.

"Sirius," Harry called, "You around?"

"Kitchen!" Was the reply. The coat rack was presented with Harry's cloak before he walked down the hall towards the kitchen.

Cider spiked with rum was the scent that caught his nose. It would seem as if Sirius was already in a Christmastide sort of mood. Not that it surprised Harry, considering in actuality that Sirius was really only about twelve. The dog animangus now sat at the head of the informal dining table in the center of the kitchen, a glittering spray of broken glass emanating from where he sat. Harry was reminded of the faerie lights in the shop windows. Sirius, though, didn't seem to be bothered by the glass, reading his newspaper as if nothing was wrong.

"Is everything all right?" Harry gingerly asked as he took a seat to Sirius's left, careful to not cut his hand on the glass. His godfather tore his eyes away from the paper to look at Harry in earnest. "Everything's fine, Prongslet, why would you think otherwise?"

Harry pointed to the glass shards, "Did you break this glass on purpose?" A pause and a sheepish look from Sirius, "It offended me."

With a swish of his wand, retrieved from his hip holster, Harry swept the broken glass off the table and into the bin. "Really though, Padfoot, be-er-serious-"

A devilish glint stood proud in Sirius's eyes as he opened his mouth.

"-and I swear if you make that pun again I'm putting this glass between your sheets."

His godfather's laugh trickled into a sigh, "It's a letter from Cissy-"

"Narcissa Malfoy?"

"Well, Black for the moment, but yeah. Lucius's Death Eater charges are being debated in the Wizengamot again, and Cissy is refusing to defend him."

"Did he throw her out?"

Another sigh, "Yeah. Draco's apparently been taken out of Lucius's will too, which, thank Merlin, will be fixed if Lucius is put in Azkaban, and it looks like it'll happen. But without any money and Andi touring Europe..."

He trailed off but Harry realized where Sirius was headed, "They need a place to stay." A nod, and a sad look filtered into Sirius's eyes, "At least until the courts can get Draco's inheritance back. I have less of a,problem with this that I thought I would but...Moons. This is his house, too, and the Malfoy's haven't been known to be the kindest to werewolves.

Summoning two mugs, Harry excused himself from the able to pour them some cider and rum. "This is a matter of choosing between the family you were given and the family you've made."

Sirius accepted the mug Harry offered him. After taking a swig, he said with some of his usual airs back, "Merlin, Harry, you've started to sound like Moony." Harry laughed, reseating himself, "I may have borrowed a book or two from him over the years."

Harry's godfather finished his drink with a few more gulps, proceeding to sit back in his chair in a uncharacteristically thoughtful silence. As Sirius retrieved a cigarette and lighted it with the tip of his wand, Harry noticed the rough patchwork of stubble that graced Sirius's cheeks, and the deepest bags under his eyes, not dissimilar to the ones he'd possessed after getting out of Azkaban. He'd obviously been thinking about this problem deeply. Finally, when the silence started getting to Harry (Sirius could never really keep his mouth shut), he said, "Look, Sirius, Remus loves you very much. I've never seen two people love each other more than the two of you. He'll listen, and I'm sure you will work something out."

A sullen look passed over Sirius's face, before he smiled, "Damn, you have to stop reading Moons's books, all right, Prongslet?" A grim look, "But yeah, I suppose you,re right. Rem and I will work it out."

Harry rose to go over and kiss the top of his godfather's head, "Old age is making you senile, Pads."

"Oi, come back here, you git."

And just like that, all was right again in the outskirts of London where the shop windows twinkled with their early winter faerie lights.

**Some headcannon-y things in this chapter, yeah. Hope ya'll enjoyed it!**


	7. Things He Has to do

**So I haven't posted in a really loooongg time, but I'm not dead, I swear. And I have better things than this in the works, I promise. Enjoy a drabbly AU thing where young!Wolfstar get to raise baby!Harry. Family fluff. Feels. It's what you people wanted.**

**Things He Has to do: Terrible Twos**

The sticky London air, much to hot for this time of the year, had settled over the house heavily. It was the kind of heavy that put you to sleep, wrapped you up in the mug and damp, and made you wake in a sweat. At four in the morning, most of the residents of London were wrapped in this foggy haze, all the lucky ones.

Then there were the not so lucky. Two 23-year-olds to be more specific. Two 23-year-olds names Remus Lupin and Sirius Black to be exact. Four in the morning in muggy London had found the two of them being startled away by their godson, currently in the middle of his terrible twos.

A while ago (and by a while I mean three minutes, when the crying wasn't so bad) Sirius had decided "terrible" wasn't a strong enough word to describe the horror that was the twos. He'd have to consult his breathing, lycanthropic dictionary at a more reasonable hour of the morning.

Sirius' hand found a sweaty lump of skin he supposed was Remus, "I handled it the last time. Get your arse out of bed and take care a' your godson."

"Mmph," Remus said, muffled by the pillows his face was stuck to, "Why is he my g'son all o' a sudden."

"Cause we now know he was blessed with his father's lungs. Move, wolf." Sirius said, pulling up his leg and pushing Remus off his side of the bed. Muttered swearing could be heard as Remus landed on the wood with a bony thump. "Fucker," Remus muttered, among other curses. His partner huffed a laugh, watching Remus tie up his pony tail out of the corner of sleepy eyes.

The blond man finally left the room, and in a few minutes, blissful silence hung in the London home again. Throwing a pillow over his head and relishing in the cool of the flip side, he was just about to be pulled into his sticky London sleep before a whisper of, "Move over prat, I have your godson."

Sirius removed the pillow from his head, looking up at Remus who had one leg on the bed, arms cradling a sleeping Harry. The werewolf was deadpanning, but had a sparkle in his tawny eyes. A breathy laugh from Sirius and then they were pressed together despite the heat; Remus with a Harry on his chest and a Sirius tucked into his side.

"Why's he _my_ g'd'son all 'ah sudden?" Sirius muttered, only half awake, finally being pulled into the sweaty sleep he awoke from half an hour ago. Remus craned his neck to kiss his partner's sweaty forehead, black baby hair sticking to skin in the heat. "Cause we now know he was blessed with his father's ability to sleep like a log."

"L'v you."

"N'ght, Siri."


End file.
